At 82, Hugh Hefner continues his playboy lifestyle with some of the most beautiful women in the world at his disposal. It's admittedly an envious position which most men do dream about; secretly or openly. A new book by Steven Watts called, "Mr. Playboy: Hugh Hefner and the American Dream", is coming out, revealing a "glorious" side of this dream; of wild late-night parties, the running of a multi-million dollar business empire that is recession-proof, and the ecstasy of having what amounts to a legal harem; beautiful women adoring you. What more could a man want? Truly, his legacy is one many men would love to emulate.
Can too much sex really hurt society? Can the policy of open sexual pleasures and the public showing of nude women on a magazine (from which his empire started) really bode ill for culture? Has Hefner really only expressed publicly what all of us desire privately? So then, how can some "innocent" sexual escapades be so outrageous to the closed-minded? The religious folks who insist on sexual virtue (sex within a monogamous relationship) are so "backward" and "restrictive"; to enforce this religious code upon society.
And so, Mr. Hefner is seen as a modern-day hero to those who want to be loosed from the puritan culture of the past. Hugh has been a primary instrument to bring about the "free love" revolution, starting with his 1953 publication of Marilyn Monroe as the first nude centerfold. To Hefner can be credited to a large degree this movement of the beginnings of the sexual revolution. As he once stated, "If there was going to be a sexual revolution, I would be its pamphleteer."
But what about the other legacy? To this hero of modern anti-puritanism, we ascribe: freedom, pleasure at will, no boundaries, and fun, fun, fun. But is there another side; a darker side of his legacy that's worth contemplating? Has his "revolution" a more somber note? Perhaps he got some things right in his life, but can we begin to ask (as he closes out his existence on earth) what possibly went, or has gone, wrong?
Many times we see the beautiful side of our wants in commercials. For example, the beer commercials always tell us one side of the story; that is, everyone's having fun, and everyone's good-looking and accepted and such. So the implication? If you drink this brand, all these things will come to you. But what happens if you like beer more than normal? Well, you may just have a brown bag in some alley, homeless and alone, unable to function because of your "fun" habit. A whole different picture.
So, what is the other picture of Mr. Hefner's wild and fun adventures? I'd like to list five "side effects" of the bunny lifestyle that might alter our concept of his benevolence. They are:
- The idea of women as objects. I'm no psychologist, but let's face it, women want to be cherished. When we men give them some attention, they feel wanted, treasured. When in decades past they dressed more modestly, men were apt to treat them like treasure, opening doors for them, letting them pass first, and taking our hats off to them in greeting. They say that when the Titanic went down, most of the men understood that they would let women and children first into the lifeboats, and die if need be to make this happen. But Hugh was part of a movement that wanted to show us another aspect of woman, undressing her for all to see her lovely features. And lets face it, we men are turned on visually. So, we began to see women's "wares", not her being. It appears that women like to "feel sexy"; that's why many don skimpy outfits to feel wanted. And it appears that men like it, so what's the harm anyway? Well, their parts are nice to look at, but I tend to look at that in women, and what I would like to do with those parts. My focus is on watching, not helping or acknowledge a lady in my presence.
- The privacy of sex is gone. What I believe was meant to be a private matter between two lovers is now splashed on tabloids, and it is fashionable to shout from the rooftops the sexual games and stories rather than say, "That's a private matter." Indeed, to do so implies that you are a "prude", or that, "You're too ashamed to admit that you don't have one"-----a sex life, that is. On the Internet, you can see just about anything that you want, because there are people who will give you whatever you want to see. And we want to see it all. There is no restraint left, but new levels are demanded everyday-----"Show us more!" Curiosity and propriety, considered part of innocence, is gone in today's culture. If those qualities are disappearing, then it's not about conversation and boundaries that make a women feel protected; it's about "getting the girl undressed." I believe that Mr. Hefner was significantly instrumental in getting us to this point and beyond.
- The dangerous arena for Women. Because a sort of "Pandora's box" has opened society's mind concerning sex whereby nothing is held in privacy from probing eyes, some form an addiction to want to fulfill their pleasures (again, I'm no doctor but it's becoming obvious that the brain can release certain pleasurable chemicals when we get to do what we want; whether it's gambling, day trading, the right drug, or the right sexual image, real or imagined). The problem is, we have now a new class of human beings among us: the sexual predator. Whatever the experts debate about, what primarily fuels the predator are sexually explicit images. And when an everyday image has been ingested, there is a thirst for more intense images to get the same "high" as before. I use personal experience and common sense as evidence. I personally feel the tension as a man to know that if I open that door, click on that website, or go by that bookstore I risk the "thrill of the rush" to a new level. Unfortunately, the end result is usually rape and murder of innocent women because that is the "ultimate rush". No, I haven't gone to that level, but common sense tells me that other men do fulfill that rush by destroying other women for their own "rush." Mr. Hefner openly and enthusiastically "opened the door" to mass production of sexual images of women who were welcoming anyone to "come and eat." I predict the sexual predator class will continue to escalate, and we'll continue to lose beautiful women to violent crime in part due to Mr. Hefner's revolution.
- The confusion of sexual definitions. As this revolution has taken roots, society is getting more and more confused about what is appropriate and what is not right. A few years ago, homosexually was defined as a "deviant lifestyle"; today, it's going modern. But what about the recent cases of grown teachers having sex with their students? What's wrong with a 40-year old falling in love with a 13-year old consenting teenager? The response might be, "The law says no one under 18." But it's love! Why 18? Who's to keep me from love? Who's to keep me from marrying three women if I want? Or a group marriage arrangement? It's all about the love! I understand there is a "man-boy" or "man-child" organization out there that wants to legalize this type of relationship. Well, why not; who says I shouldn't find happiness in whatever relationship I choose? In simpler times, there was one understood relationship that was right and appropriate. Now, anything goes, and truly no one knows where it will all end. Hugh's sexual revolution did open up the "swinging" lifestyle and made it more and more acceptable for public consumption. Now, how do we turn it off?
- The survival of the beautiful and the loss of innocence. Girls are under a tremendous pressure to do whatever it takes to be "beautiful." It's because men look at physical beauty; the message is that personality is not enough-----"You've got to have the looks." Young girls aren't stupid. Beauty is accepted, so do whatever it takes to "get it." "Enlarge those breasts; nip those thighs; straighten out that nose." And when they sense that they don't fit it to this status, they become depressed, suicidal, and without purpose. Then there's another ugly secret in the world, and in America: some of these 11-14 year-old girls get abducted into the sex slavery industry, forever altered from innocence. It is becoming increasingly clear that there is a growing child pornography market, and to get the supply for this market, young girls are taken from their communities and sold into this thing called sex slavery. We all know that pornography is a huge market; this market had it's beginnings in the mind of people like Hugh Hefner in their quest to entertain men. How do we rescue these girls now trapped in the sex trade market?
There are more reasons I could give, but this is but a sample of the other legacy that Mr. Hefner will leave behind. And lest we think all is lost, I was heartened recently upon reading of some of Hugh's recent girlfriends' statements as to why they are leaving the playboy mansion. Two of them said something like, "I've partied long enough. I want to act like a lady and get married and have kids." So in the center of pleasure headquarters, there still seems like there's something inside of us that beckons us to loyalty; to trust; to a life-long partner we can share more than body parts with. Maybe, we'll return to our roots and talk of the sexual revolution as a bright but short-lived light; a lesson of opening up doors we weren't meant to open. We shall see.
Adrian Valdivia is a contributing author for http://Bible-baby-names.com as well as a blog author at http://Gracethatworks.com. Please visit these sites for more of his writings.
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